Putin Or Providence

Hello My Friends,
  Just a couple of things have been bumping around in my head;
Uncle Donnie is about as far as the east is from the west when it comes to
leftist ideology! Hey I'm no rocket surgeon but those on the left seem a bit
dangerous to me!  I am sure that those on the right are equally scary to my leftist friends.
I look at the media, the Dems, and many of our institutions  and  wonder.........
And this thing about Putin and our election, come on!
Fake news, lie tellin, mud slingin. enough already. If all you got is
grapes and they are sour grapes, leave me the hell alone.
To me we got two options; Putin or Providence. I choose Providence.
Now I know my leftist friends despise Providence, and that leaves them
with Putin. O.k., I get it  your stupid, and that's that. Stupid is what stupid does,
You know what I mean?
So I think your stupid and you think I'm stupid, justa coupla stupidos right?
I'm not offended at all, after all we still gotta work together sometimes!
Am I right?  Of  course I'm right!

Ciao,
Uncle Donnie

Holiday Hits

How you doin,

  Here are a few holiday gems to consider:
Whats up with Christmas music playin the day after Halloween....stop it!
I hate the mall!
The friggin tree won't fit in the friggin stand!
Stop with the Family Christmas newsletters already!
Enough with the gifts and the parties and the self preoccupation!
Yet, there is never enough bourbon!
And who gives a crap about Donner and Blitzen or those
seven swimming swans!  Really!
Give me Santa Cruz over Santa Claus any day!
Oh My Gosh My Golly, it's time for michelobe and Stoli!
What part of just browsing don't you understand!
This is just ho-ho-horrible!
Jingle bells Santa smells he fell of his sleigh,
Oh what fun Did Santa have with all that pink champagne
When I sing no one listens,
Some things wrong some things missing,
I can't hit a note, I sound like a goat,
Walking in a winter wonderland!

Buon Natale,
Uncle Donnie

Time Has Come Today

HiYa Pallies,

Gonna get right to it on account of  Uncle Donnie is on
borrowed time, you know what I mean?
Time takes time , you just can't rush time,right.  Time needs to
work itself out  to figure out if its the best of times or the worst
of times. Time will tell! Am I  right?  Of course I'm right!
This is why I'm taking the time to tell what I thought of  our recent
presidential candidates during the last primary season.

Cruz....Crafty Republican Uber Zealot

Trump....Temporarily Republican Until Making President

Sanders...Sadly Another National Democrat Espousing Socialism

Clinton...Crazy Leftist Idealogue Neglecting Trust Of Nation

Time has come today....The Chambers Brothers (look it up).

Tiamo,
Uncle D.

Havin Some Fun

Hey,
  Uncle D. is on the loose, you know what I mean?
Knob Creek and ginger ale, with a splash, and just a splash of
Hazelnut schnapps does the trick. I drink them right! like I wouldn't
drink them....impossible!
So my old friend, Takashi, he aint no fugazi Woods, was trying to explain
to us the difference between self-deprecating and self-defecating.
We were playing cards, having a few drinks and having some fun, you oughta
try this ting called fun. Fun is good mi amici! Go have some! That the fun
you have may really be fun is my wish for you!
Did I mention who makes the best Old Fashioned?  No! Some other time then!
So we wait for Takashi to explain, and with a smile on his face he declares
there is no difference! Throwing crap on yourself  is both deprecating and defecating!
What could Uncle Donnie say? Fuhgettaboudit, the man is a genius!
We laughed!
Why?
Coz we was havin some fun!

Finalmente(so long)

D.

Don Whats His Name

Amici,
It is me, Don What's His Name; I'm back! It is me,for your service,
Uncle Donnie. Mi chiamo Donnie!
On my end all is good, may your end be as mine, botta bip botta boop,
if you know what I mean? Sinatra sang, That's Life, flyin high in April,
shot down in May. But I won't let it get me done, coz this world keeps spinnin round!
Things haven't changed much; hanging out with the same pallies, eating the same food and
pounding the same old drinks.....That's Life!
Just the other day my trophy wife Betty made a dish, Whatta Dish my wife is by the way,
she made Ziti Al Forno, baked Ziti! Do I have to tell you how delicioso it was?
Do I have to tell you how perfect the pasta was, how perfect the sauce, the cheeses, the spices?
It, says Uncle Donnie wassa so good ! We ate it, capisce!
On another note, I have been thinking lately how many Pastors I have known
who remind me of certain celebrities. Striking was the resemblance to Jerry Garcia was a guy who
was my Pastor for almost twenty years. Greatful Dead right? Lets just call him Dennis!
For the past three years our Pastor looked just like the guy from The Longest Yard, Burt Reynolds!
Deliverance right? Lets call him Mark! This next guy I swear to you reminds me of Michael Keaton!
Only been attending his church  for a month or so but every time I see this guy I'm thinkin
Mr. Mom or Johnny Dangerously. Its like I been goin to church at Graumans Chinese Theatre,
you know what I mean? We'll just refer to Him as Jeff.
Forty years ago Betty and I were married by a preacher who was the spittin image of Abraham
Lincoln. This guy, Dave. was a lot better volleyball player than Old Honest Abe was.
I guess he had that going for him!
All this writing is making me tired. It's probably time to hit the old fart sack(read go to bed)!

Sweet Dreams
Uncle D.

POPCORN REFILLS $3.00

Hey! How you doin?
 Are you as happy as I am that the Olympics are over?
What a waste of time, you know what I mean? My trophy wife
Betty and I watched maybe an hour of the whole thing, and I can't
even remember what events we watched. Getting poked in the eye with a sharp
stick woulda been more enjoyable than seeing anything from Russia!
I know it sounds like Uncle D. is bustin some balls here, but whats gotta be done,
has gotta be done. I mean I didn't make the rules, but I gotta enforce the rules.
I'm sure you unnastand.
On another note we went to the movies the other day. It was the new Costner
film, I can't even remember the title, Three days til something or other, I dunno.
The point is I noticed a sign in the lobby that said ....Popcorn refills $3.00!
I'm thinking, they charge about $8.00 for a bag of this stuff, and now to refill it is
another $3! Really, are you kiddin? Whatta racket this is! And I should know, right?
About rackets that is. I am convinced that the only reason they have
these theaters, right, is to sell popcorn and those $6.00 sodas. I run the numbers
in my head an figure that they could make more money if they let you in for free
and sell everyone who comes in these concessions at their current prices.
I love this country!
Your Welcome,
D.

R E F R E S H M E N T

Hi Ya Pallies,
Just got back from Scottsdale, down in the sun for awhile.
Went there with Mr. and Mrs. Woods and a coupla their  people.
Hadda great time. Got introduced to what they call a Tropical
Lemonade. Fuhggetaboudit, it was quite refreshing, and that's what
you need, when you need it, refreshment! The next time you need it,
get refreshed, Uncle D. really likes that word refreshment. Say it
with me ......r e f r e s h m e n t!
We also played a lot of cards down there. Did you ever notice that
vacation cards are always better than regular cards, just sayin.
Went to church down there and food carts were doin their thing
right on Church ground. It was like right after you get baptized you
go from the tank to get a corn dog or slice of pizza or something, you
know what I mean?
The weather was perfect, low to mid 70's, now I'm the weatherman
now, right? Swimmin, hottubbin, relaxin, whattayagonna do?

Refreshed,
Uncle Donnie